nothing to say

and with that title in mind I will leave you with a quote, it is supposed to be self-explanatory...and very obvious as to what is going through my head.

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up a whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life... You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' or 'how very perceptive' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love.

I have nothing else to say except my mind is not being fully rational anymore...

i've forgotten which people i like & which people i hate

I've been through worse, this is just another one of those pains that hurt your heart

&

My heart has been hurt before...far worse than this...

I am just letting the hurt do it's job & then fuck off.

The only part that disappointed me was I thought their might be hope, but their never is...

"They do not feel" that is a line I have repeated far too many times in the past few days...

I am trying to convince myself ...

&

I am tired of repeating myself...

"I'm waiting for someone to shake me & say - hey bitch, your wish is my command, just smile & nod, we'll understand - "